In this era of TV shows that model relating to other people with scorn and contempt as a viable means of relating….in this era of Trump behavior that does the same thing – saying that it’s ok to treat people with derision, to insult and humiliate and belittle others, to, in effect try to “trump” another by seeking to destroy any sense that they have that they are worthwhile…what can the rest of us do who know that this is a darkness….a deep sinking into all that is anti-life….that is NOT life affirming?
I think that what we can do is hold a Space of Light. A true Heart space. A space of Blessing. If there are those of us who hold this place – a place that IS life affirming…that treats others with the deep honor and respect that every soul deserves….then there are many lights shining of the planet whose rays connect like constellations, and a grid work of light patterns connect across the globe.
In my late twenties and early thirties, I lived at a yoga ashram for a few years, and one of the beliefs we lived by was that “People are more important than projects”. No matter what may be going on, or what needs to get done, it cannot be done at the expense of even one person’s feelings or sense of self-worth being wounded. If it is, then to me, it’s not worth it. Something too precious has been trampled on or damaged, or perhaps even destroyed. We must, in my opinion, as souls, “Do no harm”. For me, this is the first tenet of being. We must do the best we can with this, and continuously refine our ability to do no harm. This means living as impeccably as we can. Listening to our tones of voice; listening and being aware of how we choose to relate, even when under stress. It is easy to be kind when all is going our way. But, what about those times when it is harder to do so, when we are under duress, or something is challenging? Just as our muscles get stronger when we push past our point of comfort, so, too, we grow emotionally stronger, we grow more beautiful, when we rise above our own stress or discomfort and can still be kind and compassionate, aware of what we are putting out into the world, and how what we are doing or saying impacts others. This is being awake, and mindful. And in this way, we evolve.
I know someone who gets so disturbed and distraught and anxious about not doing it right that he, in trying so hard to do it right, and get it all done efficiently, becomes harsh and often unkind. It defeats the very purpose of what he is trying to do. He is so sure that others will blame him or shame him for “not doing it right” that he is then the one who treats others with harshness and disrespect because of his own tenseness and lack of self worth. When we value and treasure and love ourselves, and when we know that we are more important then how something gets done – that, in fact, there is no “getting it right”, as we all do things our own way, then we can value and treasure others, and treat them with that same respect. It is so often our own shame that has us thinking that others are disapproving of us, or thinking we are not good enough, that causes us to be tense and unkind with others, when, in truth, no one is thinking that at all. It’s all in the mind.
When stressed, take a moment to go into your heart, to see the blessings of your life….to know that we are all souls doing our best to live this dharma, to grow, to evolve, to face our challenges and heal our wounds. Then, even if we see another treating someone unkindly, we can gaze upon them with our own light of compassion and understanding – giving them the space to grow and evolve, and adding light, rather then darkness, to the world.
This is a life work for evolving souls.